Hii so i've completely neglected this recently, sorrry..but i have been busyy..and haven't been learning a whole lott..untill this past couple of dayss..untill i stopped worry about what people thought about me in Bangor, stopped thinking about myself and actually turned to God and let him in again :)
Recently ive just had the idea of the character of christ in my head..and that in ALLL things i need to be acting like Christ and its just really not acceptable when i dont..like with people who wind me up and i wana make wee cheeky remarks and undermine them and i cant!!cause if i did that i would be undermining Christ..and making a mockery of his spirit in me..Particularly when someone does something that offends me or hurts me..everything within me wants to turn round and bite their head off, defend myselff..but i have to have humility and just lay down my rights, and its not easyy..
Also realised that i am a hopeless romanticc..haha not that theres any romance in my life..ha and i am ok with that..kinda..working on it..ha. watched Beastly the other night with my wee mum and i just love it soo much..ahha absolute sop!!
and i've become obssessed with twiiterrr..!if you have it.. SophLen (if you dont, get it) but i warn you its major addictive..And on there i follow Greg James, whos going out with the lovely Ellie Goulding (like i know them hahahaha ccreeeeeep) so she was singing at the private royal wedding reception..and that he, obv just before she started the gig he tweeted "You'll have to excuse me. My favourite person in the world is about to do the gig of her life and i couldn't be more proud. What a day." HOW STINKIN CUTE! i actually nearly cried..haha definatly not ok..but he just loves her so much and just isn't afraid!!hahahahaha hopeless romantic me..
cause ive been really struggling with studying and having good quite times and then this morning in church i was like ok this week God i'll try really hard...and i just completely caught myself and was like I wont be able to try anything and if i do ill just faill..so i was like God i cant do this, i don't have a thirst right now..will you please help me to be motivated and to desire to spend more time with you...and i trust that he will!!
Also Gods been teaching me alot that its my choice..Like i believe God is completely in control, that he has planned it all and is Sovereign in everything but i also believe i have free will. i dont know how these things add up but i just have to accept that that's the way it is..But that like i can choose to have alot of friends, or to go out or drink or have a boyfriend or be the popular one who makes a lot of sarcastic jokes and just be liked by the worlds standards......or i can have Jesus. And i have to make that choice in every action i make...cause if i want like to have alot of friends, that are good friends but not necessarily encouraging then God will give them to me..cause its like the blind man in Luke 18, he just wanted sight so Jesus gave it to him..He will honour us in our requests i think sometimes. If Jesus was standing in front of you and would give you anything you wanted what would you ask for?this of this world or just to love him more? Sometimes i'm really not sure and it scares me. Or i can choose to just be alone a lot more for now untill God brings some good, encouraging friends that he has chosen for me into my life..So its like sacrificing what would feel good now for something better..you know?and that then when i make that choice to wait for better friends then i need to be joyful in that and not mope when i feel a bit lonley cause i trust that Gods timing is better than mine!! And he is slowly starting to do it..and i have really really great friends..had such a funny walk with Z yesturdayy..just chat and walk round the coast it was lovely..and wee Hana, Sian and Emma are away back to unii..i miss them alottt :(
So yeaa, trying not to control my life too much..trusting that God is in controll its difficult though!cause theres alot that i want to do but i needa trust Gods timinggg..
And go back to leeds on tues...SO EXCITEDDDDD..cant wait to see everybodyy..its been toooooo longgggggg
Sunday, 1 May 2011
Sunday, 24 April 2011
coffee dates and conversations
so its strange being home..the blogs will probably be quite different noww..
I have been truely blessed with great friends..its difficult having two very different groups of friends..but both are awesome..
I am excited for what God is going to do in Bangor, I'm not sure what it will look like, i am sure it will be very different from o.t.w...but i know it will be incredible..when people give God room to move, he will move..
I am continually falling into the trap of being dissapointed with people and myself..its highly frustrating..i need to learn a little more grace i think.
God has just been pressing on my heart Matt28v20b...."i am with you always...even to the end of the agee.."
I have been truely blessed with great friends..its difficult having two very different groups of friends..but both are awesome..
I am excited for what God is going to do in Bangor, I'm not sure what it will look like, i am sure it will be very different from o.t.w...but i know it will be incredible..when people give God room to move, he will move..
I am continually falling into the trap of being dissapointed with people and myself..its highly frustrating..i need to learn a little more grace i think.
God has just been pressing on my heart Matt28v20b...."i am with you always...even to the end of the agee.."
Thursday, 21 April 2011
Tuesday, 19 April 2011
202 views...
sooo....my blogs been looked at 202 times........this is worrying!ha..
its so awesome to be home :) lovely to see people and just talk..
been reading alot about reasonable service....like christianity is our reasonable service...Like umm..its logical!it makes sense for us to give our lives to God, to work for him and be obedient..we think that we deserve rewards and to be blessed but we don't!!we deserve hell.....we do not deserve Jesus, but we get him!!ah i just love this....and he is just MAD about us...my one word to describe Jesus...or God..is jealous...So Don always challenges us to describe God in one word but it can't be christianese..and his is intoxicating..mine is definaltly jealous...and i love itttt..
anyway..sometimes i just get distracted with Jesus...ha..but in the airport i was thinking about Romans 12v1..we looked at it a while ago in our Romans class with Pastor Larry..so the first verse in my bible reads "....in view of God's mercy...offer your bodies as a living sacrifice to God...this is your spiritual act of worship.." so i have an NIV translation and i am learning swiftly that i would like to have alot of translations to look at once..so thank goodness for the internet....i remember Pastor Larry not being too happy with the NIV so i looked up the King James version..."....by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service..." i just love that..like its logical for us to give our lives to him.
then i was reading in Luke 17v7-10.. “Suppose one of you has a servant plowing or looking after the sheep. Will he say to the servant when he comes in from the field, ‘Come along now and sit down to eat’? Won’t he rather say, ‘Prepare my supper, get yourself ready and wait on me while I eat and drink; after that you may eat and drink’? Will he thank the servant because he did what he was told to do? So you also, when you have done everything you were told to do, should say, ‘We are unworthy servants; we have only done our duty.’”
and i just think its so truee..that this is our duty..and we should just do it.without complaining and with a joyful attitude..without expecting a prize here, because we already have the prize..the prize already gave his life so he could have us!and then we will get crowns in heaven when our works are tested by fire...and out of gratitude...we will give the crowns back...we will lay them at our master's feet..cause it would be the honourable thing to do...
Acts20v24 "...however i consider my life worth nothing to me..if only i may finish the race..and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me...the task of testifying to the gospel of God's grace..." and this task of sharing the good news of God's unbelievable grace, isn't always a task which requires us to head off to the deepest parts of the Amazon and risk our livess..its a task we should carry out in our daily lives..plant the seed, we cannot make it grow, so do not be discouraged by outcomes that don't always seem profitable...We may not need to sacrifice our lives or jobs..but maybe our popularity, image, things that we put above God..how can we testify to his grace if we are not whole heartedly devoted..and in love with him first and foremost...?
its so awesome to be home :) lovely to see people and just talk..
been reading alot about reasonable service....like christianity is our reasonable service...Like umm..its logical!it makes sense for us to give our lives to God, to work for him and be obedient..we think that we deserve rewards and to be blessed but we don't!!we deserve hell.....we do not deserve Jesus, but we get him!!ah i just love this....and he is just MAD about us...my one word to describe Jesus...or God..is jealous...So Don always challenges us to describe God in one word but it can't be christianese..and his is intoxicating..mine is definaltly jealous...and i love itttt..
anyway..sometimes i just get distracted with Jesus...ha..but in the airport i was thinking about Romans 12v1..we looked at it a while ago in our Romans class with Pastor Larry..so the first verse in my bible reads "....in view of God's mercy...offer your bodies as a living sacrifice to God...this is your spiritual act of worship.." so i have an NIV translation and i am learning swiftly that i would like to have alot of translations to look at once..so thank goodness for the internet....i remember Pastor Larry not being too happy with the NIV so i looked up the King James version..."....by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service..." i just love that..like its logical for us to give our lives to him.
then i was reading in Luke 17v7-10.. “Suppose one of you has a servant plowing or looking after the sheep. Will he say to the servant when he comes in from the field, ‘Come along now and sit down to eat’? Won’t he rather say, ‘Prepare my supper, get yourself ready and wait on me while I eat and drink; after that you may eat and drink’? Will he thank the servant because he did what he was told to do? So you also, when you have done everything you were told to do, should say, ‘We are unworthy servants; we have only done our duty.’”
and i just think its so truee..that this is our duty..and we should just do it.without complaining and with a joyful attitude..without expecting a prize here, because we already have the prize..the prize already gave his life so he could have us!and then we will get crowns in heaven when our works are tested by fire...and out of gratitude...we will give the crowns back...we will lay them at our master's feet..cause it would be the honourable thing to do...
Acts20v24 "...however i consider my life worth nothing to me..if only i may finish the race..and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me...the task of testifying to the gospel of God's grace..." and this task of sharing the good news of God's unbelievable grace, isn't always a task which requires us to head off to the deepest parts of the Amazon and risk our livess..its a task we should carry out in our daily lives..plant the seed, we cannot make it grow, so do not be discouraged by outcomes that don't always seem profitable...We may not need to sacrifice our lives or jobs..but maybe our popularity, image, things that we put above God..how can we testify to his grace if we are not whole heartedly devoted..and in love with him first and foremost...?
Friday, 15 April 2011
last day
psalm115v3 "our God is in heaven..he does whatever pleases him...."
to our human mind this seems like a violation of our rights..we get so mad..God is selfish he can't just do what he likes with me...
yes he can.
God limits himself...he is not entirely free..he cannot lie, cheat or steal..he cannot sin...so that he is holy and wholly good.
He is outside of time...Matt Chandler uses an illustration like imagine there's an hour long tv show..and i show you one millisecond of it...and i watch the whole thing...and then we argue about what the shows about..who will win?God see's everything..where we came from and where we're going..he not only see's it.he planned it.
so if God is wholly good, and outside of time..already in tomorrow and in 10 years....then i am glad that he does what pleases him.
Eph2v10
"For we are God’s workmanship..created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do...."
the greek for workmanship is polema..which is translated as poetic expressionn...we are God's poetic expression...
to our human mind this seems like a violation of our rights..we get so mad..God is selfish he can't just do what he likes with me...
yes he can.
God limits himself...he is not entirely free..he cannot lie, cheat or steal..he cannot sin...so that he is holy and wholly good.
He is outside of time...Matt Chandler uses an illustration like imagine there's an hour long tv show..and i show you one millisecond of it...and i watch the whole thing...and then we argue about what the shows about..who will win?God see's everything..where we came from and where we're going..he not only see's it.he planned it.
so if God is wholly good, and outside of time..already in tomorrow and in 10 years....then i am glad that he does what pleases him.
Eph2v10
"For we are God’s workmanship..created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do...."
the greek for workmanship is polema..which is translated as poetic expressionn...we are God's poetic expression...
Thursday, 14 April 2011
Wednesday, 13 April 2011
too hot
so my tan swiftly turned to burn..devvooo..but its soo hot and i can't sleep
buut o2 have bluebook right so they saved every message i sent from like Jan08 till now..and then they had to stop doing it so they emailed me a folder with every text i've ever recieved or sent in my life..and just reading over some of them from 2009..some very funny..some making me sadd!but its just funny how much you change!
buut o2 have bluebook right so they saved every message i sent from like Jan08 till now..and then they had to stop doing it so they emailed me a folder with every text i've ever recieved or sent in my life..and just reading over some of them from 2009..some very funny..some making me sadd!but its just funny how much you change!
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