so here's the story..
i wrote a post this morning about how destructive it is when we talk about each other
i was hurt and angry when i wrote so i withdrew it, with the aim to re-post it if i still felt the same tonight..
i am not angry and a little less hurt
its is extremely hard to find joy when things seem to be going wrong
it is extremely hard not to focus on these things, to want revenge and to want the world to know what has been done to you
i spent the day doing uni work and having a wee cry to Jesus
and he reminded me of a song that i have quoted more than once on this blog
"turn your eyes upon Jesus, look full in his wonderful face and the things of this world will grow strangely dim in the light of his beauty and grace.."
i love this song alot but i couldn't do it..i couldn't focus on Jesus, i couldn't pray all i could do was talk about myself and why i was upset
maybe its a girl thing but my mind was going round and round
i messaged few people who i trust and love and asked them to pray
and they must have done because something clicked..
i don't have a miraculous answer as to how i was able to be content despite being hurt
but i know that all i had to do was look back over my life and at all the times i thought i had lost everything
and how each one of those times something greater came of it
things are hard and people are hurtful
but i still have God..
i was able to see the footprints
i realised that he knows
and i remembered that he has a plan
a plan that i am not the centre of